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Ask Ang November 19: Breaking Condoms, Difficulty Orgasming, and Anal Enjoyment

Welcome to Ask Ang, your anonymous campus sexual health resource, brought to you by H*yas for Choice. We are made up of a team of undergraduate students who work to answer your sex questions! We post questions and answers weekly on Sundays. Anyone can submit a question, and the anonymous form can be found here:

  1. I recently had anal sex (I am a cis woman) for the first time and found it somewhat enjoyable. What are some ways (aside from lube and preparation with manual stimulation) to make anal more pleasurable and stimulating?

We’ve gotten a few questions previously about how to make anal sex more enjoyable, and you can check out Question 5 of the October 9 edition and Question 3 in the November 12 edition for some of that information. You mentioned lube and preparation with manual simulation in your question (both incredibly important!), so outside of those tips, here are three key things we’d highlight for you:

1. Go slow! Let the receptive partner determine speed of the penetration, and don’t be afraid to start slowly.

2. Find your own rhythm! Play around with different grinding and rocking motions that might feel good for you. Don’t feel pressured to replicate the rhythms of vaginal sex during anal, and prioritize your comfort.

3. Figure out what works for you! Just as with any other sex act, there are countless different ways to do anal and different things will good for your body specifically. Trying different speeds, rhythms, positions, hygienic preparations, insertive methods (butt plug, dildo, finger, penis), and lubes to figure out what is best for you will make anal sex more enjoyable.

For more online tips, feel free to browse one of the following resources: